Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
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