if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
