Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
