I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
