Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Pappa wants mamma naked
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
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