U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
