Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize