I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
