He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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