I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Randomize
