new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize