whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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