There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I will pee on everything he values.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
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