I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
jump out the window naked night went bad
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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