just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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