somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Randomize
