So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize