I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
