you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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