She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I stole a fireplace last night.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
my liver is dry heaving
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Randomize
