hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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