I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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