that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
