my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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