just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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