Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
