I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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