I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
