He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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