I just saw a hot homeless man
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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