Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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