I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
