3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
