Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
