Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
