i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
