Grow some girl-balls and come out already
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
