I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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