Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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