Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
