They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
