I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
