she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
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