More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
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