He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
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