You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
