Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
