so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
