Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
