I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
