We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
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