Christians are straight up FREAKS
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Randomize
