Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
